Elusive

The art of the meet and greet…

Things were easier when I just had one full time job.  Heck, just one job period.  It’s trickier now that I have two.  Because of this, whenever I make plans, even if it’s something for just half a day, I have to know in advance, so I can adjust accordingly. 

If I don’t happen to work one or both on that particular day, that is one thing. 

However, if plans are being made, and for some reason, they fall through, I lose out on money, since neither one of these gigs I’m on do vacation pay.

Facebook-Wanna Meet?

Late last year, I made a listing of people on my FB that I would like to meet.  I make reference to the old blog because one of the people is who I speak of. 

At first, I would bring it up and the person would be receptive to it.  It seemed all up until the day of the actual meeting.

My protocol is as follows (particularly if I’m the one doing the travel):

1.       To reach out a day or two before to confirm plans are still in action. 

2.       Then, on the day of, especially if I am traveling via public transportation, I call or text to see if all is still intact.  I wait until I hear back from the person before going forward.  If I don’t hear back, I automatically assume there is a cancellation.  If I hear everything is cool, I press forward.

3.       Halfway through the trip, I give a call or text again, just to make sure no hiccups have occurred along the way.  Once confirmation is obtained, I don’t reach out again until I have made it to the final destination just to make sure things haven’t changed.

I know some may think it’s a bit excessive.  However, I have been burned in a few instances where I’m the one doing the meeting.

In one meeting, I actually flew to meet the person, only for the person to have not shown up.  All through the contact, he said nothing about not being able to meet me at the airport.  Then, when I finally touched down, I couldn't get a hold of him.  I waited for hours before finally arranging to fly back. 

In some instances (like from NJ to NY), I've come out there and the person tells me at the last minute things aren't going to go down. 

Depending on what part of NY I am in dictates which direction I go in next.  

If I’m able to get to some familiar part (and have available funding), then I’ll spend some extra time entertaining myself with the sites so the trip isn't a total loss.  However, if it’s a part where I normally wouldn't travel (and I’m just there because you’re there), I’m going to head back. 

NJ Transit has gone up significantly since I first moved up here, so I don’t have that type of money to consistently shell out, and I really am not a fan of battling NY traffic.

So to cut down on aggravation, I had to put those certain protocols in place, like the multiple texting, calling, and checking in.  I can no longer take someone’s excitement and suggestion as confirmation she’s going to actually meet up with me.

Like, the times I have suggested it (and the other person has agreed), I implemented the protocols.  Like stated before, she would be receptive until the day of meeting. 

A couple of times, things came up just before I made the journey.  One time, she actually forgot what day we agreed on and made other plans.

So I stopped bringing it up and decided if there was to be any type of meeting, she would have to come to New Jersey.  I left it open and just told her, “If you happen to be in NJ, just let me know.  Maybe we can make arrangements just to meet up and have food.”

She seemed pretty receptive.

There have been moments when she has been in New Jersey (because it seems Facebook can’t keep anything private, plus I pay attention to where mobile stats are coming from), and I’m like, “Hey you didn't tell me you were visiting Jersey!”

Then, it would be instances where either she didn't know she’d be in NJ or she didn't realize how close her location was from my location—things like that.

So, now I sit back and wait for her to suggest it. 

The first time she suggested it, I couldn't do it because I was reporting back to work after I had taken some time off for my birthday. 

The latest time it was suggested was just this past weekend.  One of the rare instances, I had off from both on Monday, so I’m like, “Reach out; let me know.”

I was going to get some cleaning done any way, but this made it even more of an incentive.  I was proud to get a lot of things done.  I normally would work out Saturday or Sunday but just in case there would actually be a visit, I moved one of my days to Friday and opted to work out Monday, either before or after the visit.

I figured it would be more likely to happen if it came from her suggesting it rather than me suggesting it.

Yet no call, no text, and no visit.

I’m not going to front and act like I’m not a little annoyed.  I did shift around my workout schedule slightly.  I was probably going to do Monday regardless, but I shifted one day to Friday, so I could do the majority of the cleaning on Saturday.  Usually I do cleaning on Sunday.

I just would like a bit of courtesy, that’s all.  Like, if one isn't going to show, just be like, “Hey, I know I suggested it, but…” 

Or if you have hesitation about meeting, that’s fine, too. 

But just don’t straight up not say anything.

A little courtesy goes a long way.

Peace.